While the first few days feel like I blur I still remember the feeling. The feeling of utter joy to have my new baby in my arms but I also remember just feeling so overwhelmed, anxious, scared, and of course tired. I remember wishing away the early days. I can’t wait until he sleeps through the night or I can’t wait until he no longer has to feed every two hours.
But then the days started to fly by, and those early sleepless nights were a distant memory. As someone once told me “The days are long but the years are short.” And it’s so true – this year flew by in the blink of an eye. And 13 months since I said see ya later to the Weather Network to embark on this incredible new journey as mom – it is time to head back to work.
This year has been my biggest year of growth yet. It has taught me patience, kindness, love (like I have never known before) and what is truly important to me. It has been a year full of memories, laughter, tears, and now it is time to turn the page on the book again and start a new chapter.
I was speaking with my therapist the other day about the anxiety I am having around finding the perfect balance. A balance between work and life they say but it is so much more than that, work, life, family, friends, my baby, and myself. It sounds like something only a superhero could do. I was feeling so overwhelmed that this wasn’t possible. And you know what – finding that perfect balance might not be humanly possible -but we decided I would just take it one day at a time.
Before having Max my life was my work – I had worked for 10 years to get to where I am and I finally found a job that I actually saw as a career that I love. After years of working part time, freelance, hard news and all the in between moments. At the Weather Network I have finally had a chance to tell real stories, ones that matter. Bringing important information to people, while also focusing on climate change and sustainability – which is something I care deeply about. I have had a chance to even create my own documentaries on these topics. I love my work – it has allowed me to travel and explore. I have seen the Northern Lights in the Yukon, the glaciers that tower over Whistler, the grizzlies of the Great Bear Rainforest. I have been given so many incredible opportunities and I am truly excited to see what comes next as the videographer and bureau chief for the Weather Network out here in British Columbia.
But now I have this new priority in my life. Gone are the days where I can just pack a bag and go. Gone are the days where I can just drop everything and run out to cover active weather. It is going to be a new balancing act for sure – one that I am nervous to try and conquer, but also one that I am excited about. I am excited to write this next chapter of my life – of our lives.
I know it isn’t going to be easy, there are going to be hiccups, and bumps and challenges – but that is the world we live in, and now I know just how challenging it is to be a working mom, but I want to be a mom that my son is proud of.
So mommas I see you, I feel you and I am here with you as you start to write new chapters of your own lives.